10 Templars walk into a Bar
by Engineer of Epicness
Summary: A short story that popped into my head. WARNING: deaths of unnamed, minor characters


**This is a slight AU set just before Assassin's Creed 1. It does NOT fit in with the actual timeline, nor do I want it to. It's just a plot bunny that I caught.**

"Talking"

" _Thinking"_

 **30 Templars walked into a Bar.**

Desmond Miles lent back against the shelf behind him, and looked over his bar. After a few years working at the White Knife bar, he had taken over from the previous owner. Even though he was technically the owner in all but name, Desmond still enjoyed working at the bar. It gave him a sense of purpose, mixing drinks, pouring shots, and debating sport with the regulars.

Being a Wednesday, the bar was relatively quiet, only housing the regulars. Desmond knew each of them by name, and choice of poison… err drink. Stan, a Scott to his core, only drank whiskey, while Lucy preferred her cocktails. Wade, he preferred a quart of beer, and his drinking buddy, Jimmy, usually downed whatever was on tap. It made Desmond smile. The drinks were usually an apt reflection of the drinker's personality.

Hearing the door open, he stood straight up, ready to pour a new round. A well dressed, older man led the new comers in. Desmond didn't recognise any of them. A quick mental headcount determined that there were 10 of them.

The apparent leader strode forward and pulled out a folding badge, like those that federal agents use. The badge, that Desmond did not recognise as one of the police badges, was a gold cross with a circle around it. He could just make some sort of motto inscribed in the lower arc of the circle.

"Good evening. Welcome to the White Knife. What would you gentlemen like to drink?"

Badge shook his head, "Nothing, barkeep. We are looking for someone. A Desmond Miles."

The regulars scattered throughout the bar all stiffened slightly. Desmond mimed thinking, taping his finger on his chin.

"Can't say I've met someone with that name. He an old boyfriend?"

"No, you idiot. Do I look gay to you? We need his help in an… investigation."

"Is that so? He kill someone then?"

"In a way. If such a person does, could you please direct him to Abstergo Industries. That is our base of operations, for this investigation."

Badge turned around and started for the door, motioning for his entourage to follow him. Lucy, from her spot at the end of the bar, caught Desmond's eye, and nodded. Desmond caked out.

"Mr Badge. I'd just like to confirm something, for if I do encounter a Desmond Miles. I'm to tell him that the Knights Templar are looking for him?"

"How do you…"

Badge was cut short, as each regular pulled a hood up, their eyes shadowed under the peaks.

"The White Knife? Did that not ring and bells, Templar?" Desmond pulled up his own hood.

"Assassins!"

The Templars reached into their jackets, for firearms, probably. But, alas, they were too slow. Wade had his two _shoto,_ short blades out, each in a separate body. Jimmy, had his trench knives at the throat of another. Stan had _picked up_ two Templars by their throats, holding them a good 40 centimetres in the air. Throwing knives had flown from one of the corner booths, killing four other Templars. 2 hooded figure followed the blades at a sedate pace.

Meanwhile, Desmond had jumped straight over his bar counter, catching Badge's shoulder in his right hand, pinning the man to the ground. His gold eyes glinted ominously under the traditional hood,

"You are looking for Desmond Miles, descendant of Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad of Masyaf? You're looking at him."

"But, you left the Brotherhood years ago. How…?"

"Where you are blinded by facts, we know that Nothing is true. Your 'spy' was giving you misinformation."

With a _snick,_ Desmond released his hidden blade from the bracer on his left arm, and slid it cleanly into Badge's throat.

"Rest in Peace, Templar."

Desmond stood and looked at the carnage in his bar. Every Templar in the room had been killed.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, you know the rules. You make a mess, you clean it up."

After the bodies had been cleaned up, and prepped for transport to another base for autopsies, Desmond poured a round for everyone.

Taking a sip, he turned to Lucy Stillman, their plant in Abstergo.

"So, Lucy, I left the Brotherhood years ago?"

"Yes. As far as they know, after you ran away from the Farm, you drifted for a while. Then you found work at this bar."

"Idiots. They should know that after the Cray incident, the Mentor wouldn't allow anyone to just leave. How's Clay doing?"

"Not well. We'll need to get him out soon. The bleeding effect is progressing to far, soon he won't be able to control it."

"Right. I'll put it on the board. We move on Saturday."

 **And that's that. This is just a random thought, inspired by a scene in the Deadpool movie. Speaking of, anyone spot the cameo?**

 **I'm probably out on a few things here, and guess what? I don't care. It's a one-shot, and will stay as is. If anyone wants to use this, go for it, just don't copy and paste, and tell me.**

 **Read, Enjoy, and Review.**

 **Engineer of Epicness.**


End file.
